I am a big fan of the Mayhem Allstate commercials. I think that guy has the best job in the world. So this week’s horoscopes are all about the different types of Mayhem. I should add that I probably shouldn’t be doing this because it’s free advertising for Allstate, with whom I have no affiliation. I don’t even use Allstate! Although Mayhem totally makes me want to switch companies…if I paid for my own car insurance.
Taurus – Pink SUV. “OMG Becky’s not even hot.”
Gemini – Text Walker. So enthralled in conversation of any kind. Pay attention!
Cancer – Raccoon. Nesting in fluffy stuff and having babies. Yup.
Leo – Jogger. Wreaking havoc just by looking good.
Virgo – Toddler. When you want attention, you act like one.
Libra – GPS. Leading people astray because they didn’t bother to update you. That was their fault. Recalculating!
Scorpio – Blind Spot. I thought he looked the most demented in this one. That’s why.
Sagittarius – Motorcycle. No one should be trusting you with a test-drive.
Capricorn – Large Espresso. “I’m a filthy rich executive.” Enough said.
Aquarius – Toilet Flood. Because you’re the water-bearer. Badumching!
Pisces – Guard Dog. Someone gives you a big, meaty bone, and you are rendered less than useless.
EDIT: The videos became dead links, so I removed them. Boo.